Snap, Crackle, Pop

I'm sure I've said it before, but it's worth repeating that all vinyl is not created equal. I used to assume that the 12" singles I bought in the 80's and 90's sounded poor because my turntable was rubbish and I didn't look after my vinyl very well. Well it turns out that is only partly true.

One particular 'slab of wax' that frustrated me was the remix 12" of "Inside Out" by Electribe 101. My copy crackled and popped as if it had been covered with iron filings and scratched with a nail. Right from brand new this vinyl just wouldn't play properly. It was a real shame as the MCM Remix was one of the best remixes of any Electribe 101 track and, in truth, was probably one of the best things the band ever released. Yet all I had was a rubbish 12" that was barely listenable.

Fast forward 20 years and I buy another copy from Discogs in an attempt to do justice to the music. When the single turned up I lay it reverentially on the platter, dropped the needle and lo and behold, exactly the same 'scratches' all over the first track. Whoever mastered this 12" obviously never listened back to it and I can only assume neither did the band.

Having recorded the vinyl into my PC I attempted to repair the audio and make a good master of the MCM Mix. Once done I might finally get to hear it in something approaching its full glory. Yet the audio was so mashed, I gave up editing despite having put quite a few hours into the attempt. Over the years I keep loading up the Audacity file and tinker around removing huge sratches and  'repairing' sections of audio. But the task remains so mammoth I am losing faith that I will ever hear the MCM mix without the offending clicks.

Watch out

I have liked Nine Inch Nails ever since I heard "Sin" in a record shop sometime in 1991. I've bought everything Trent et al have released and been to see them in concert. Whilst I love NIN, I am less enamoured with side projects such as How To Destroy Angels or their soundtrack work. As a consequence, when I heard that Trent and Atticus were recording the score for an HBO series of Watchmen my primary response was: "Meh".

Then one night, the Youtube algorithms did their thing and recommended I listen to the new Watchmen soundtrack. Five seconds after clinking play I was scouring the Internet looking for a place to order the vinyl and apologising to Trent for ever doubting him under my breath.

Once the TV series started, I watched it to hear more of the music. Before I knew it I was actually enjoying a geeky series about superheroes. That's quite an achievement as I hate superhero stuff usually.

Anyway, fast forward to the day the vinyl arrives. I ignore all of the weird 'in universe' artwork and nonsense and pull out the slab of wax. The first thing that I notice are a few hairline scratches on this new vinyl. "Maybe it was a trick of the light," I say to myself. Then I queue up the record and drop the needle. OK a couple of pops, I can handle that, static and dust from a new LP is not uncommon. But the clicks and pops keep coming. I begin to ponder if it's noise added intentionally. I stop the turntable to have another look at the record more closely.

WTF?.....

This brand new vinyl, straight out of the cellophane, looks like a dogs dinner. I try the other side and it's just as bad. I soon deduced that there is nothing wrong with the mastering or the lacquer used for the pressing; it just looks like it has been handled badly during the manufacturing process. It is covered in scratches.

I decided to go online to find out what is happening. Having ignored the troll telling me I need a better turntable and speakers as there is nothing wrong with his copy (guess my amp must be OK - even though the cretin has no idea of what I'm using) I realise I am not alone in receiving a crappy vinyl; some people even have fingerprints accompanying their scratches. Luckily the NIN fulfilment guys are exchanging my copy. Let's hope its second time lucky for Sons of Pale Horse. So if you're listening to your copy of the Watchemn soundtrack thinking, "When did my turntable turn into a Crosley suitcase?" I can assure you that you are not alone.